The Bachelor recap: “Everyone Is Rubbing Their Ass On Him Right Now”

i-puked-bachelorstill tastes fine bachelor.JPG

You might’ve spent your MLK Monday picking your nose and Liking videos of goats befriending anteaters or some shit, but The Bachelor takes #NoDaysOff, OKAY?

Since last week was To Be Continued, they have to back this ish up and refresh our memories about LIZ, DUN DUN DUNNN. Remember her? He kicked her to the curb, but she’ll probably still put “MET AND FUCKED NICK VIALL AT JADE AND TANNER’S WEDDING” on her headstone (she’s already purchased the plot next to Nick’s great grandmother).

Continue reading