When Someone Says They Don’t Like Pasta August 20, 2018August 20, 2018Leave a comment It’s not me, it’s you. [via]
When Someone Gives Me Very Specific Instructions June 17, 2018 “You got that??” “Um, yep! Sure thing! Right-o!” [via]
When Someone Explains The Stock Market To Me May 22, 2018May 22, 2018Leave a comment I’m only invested in two companies: Sephora and T.G.I. Friday’s. [via]
When You’ve Been Traveling, Been To Prison, and Just Want To Be Close To Home May 8, 2018May 8, 2018Leave a comment Also: want to order Thai food. [via]
When Someone Points Out How Many Drinks I’ve Had July 6, 2017July 6, 2017Leave a comment You gonna tell me how many breadsticks I’ve eaten too? [via]
When Someone Spoils A Finale June 21, 2017June 21, 2017Leave a comment <<swigs wine, turns TV off>> [via]
When Someone Describes Their Sexual Fantasies June 19, 2017June 19, 2017Leave a comment You wanna do what with a spiralizer? [via]
When You’re Just Tryna Do Hood Rat Shit With Your Friends March 21, 2017March 21, 2017Leave a comment <<adjusts one-strapped bathing suit, orders pizza>> [via]
When You Tell Your Friends You Stopped Smoking Weed November 15, 2016November 15, 2016Leave a comment It’s not like you guys have been friends with me for ten years. [via]
When Someone Says They Love Working Out November 14, 2016November 14, 2016Leave a comment I can’t even believe we connect as friends. [via]
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