I woke up feeling like it was Christmas morning. My presents? Fuckin’ goats.

I’ve wanted to pet goats for awhile now, and I’m not afraid to admit that. I think they’re hilarious and awesome and just plain silly. So when I was the only adult in Muriel’s Ranch at the LA Zoo this weekend, I kept my head held high.

“Do you want to come in?” The attendant asked, looking to see if I had any children with me. I did not.

“Hell motherfucking yes I do.”

What did YOU do this weekend? Did you brush goats? Yeah. Didn’t think so.